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mercoledì 22 giugno 2011

Never Mind The Botox

THE secrets of cosmetic surgery are about to be revealed in a new four-book series called Never Mind The Botox.

The co-authors, Penny Avis and Joanna Berry, go behind the glossy brochures, reassuring pep talks and immaculate receptions to reveal the often ugly and occasionally gruesome reality of major surgery done in the name of beauty.

While we are often assured the "down time" is minimal and side-effects are rare, this book tells you exactly what you could be letting yourself in for.

Although the books are classed as fiction, the authors have based their novels on the real-life accounts of patients and industry insiders to uncover what we are having nipped and tucked.

Here Penny and Joanna write exclusively for The Sun and reveal the most shocking and extreme cosmetic surgery procedures they came across during their research.

The squeamish should look away now...

Toe tucks - toes lengthened, shortened or narrowed to fit designer sandals

This is the latest must-have surgery for those who want to look perfect in their strappy sandals.
With Keira Knightly allegedly using a foot double, as her feet are "too big and veiny" and Victoria Beckham's bunions getting about as many column inches as her husband, it's not surprising that mere mortals are stressing about the appearance of their feet.
The "toe-besity" procedure list, costing from £3,000, includes:
Toe tuck - slims the little toe to help you fit into narrow shoes - can involve shaving the bone and fat reduction.
Toe slimming - removes fatty deposits that make the toes look uneven.
Toe shortening - reduces the length of toes (normally the second toe) so they form a perfect arc shape.
Foot lift - lifts the arches of your foot to make high heels more comfortable.

The chance of complications from these surgeries is high, including permanent nerve damage, infection, bleeding, scarring and chronic pain when walking. At its worst, foot cosmetic surgery gone bad could make it difficult for a woman to wear any shoes at all.
We came across one lady in the US who still couldn't walk on her left foot nine months after surgery and developed neck and back complications as the other foot took the strain. Her bills for the extensive physiotherapy she needed were not covered by her medical insurance and that, combined with being off work for months, sent her badly into debt. We would rather have ugly feet.

Mummy makeover 'gift cards' covering price of a boob job, nose job and tummy tuck

Confronted with celebrities Angelina Jolie and Katie Holmes bouncing back into shape seemingly seconds after giving birth, mummy makeovers are growing in popularity.
Jennifer Lopez, Britney Spears and Kerry Katona are all said to have had them. Combine that with the dramatic rise in the range of cosmetic surgery procedures available, it is not surprising that gift vouchers have swiftly followed suit.

However, these can backfire. We came across a man who gave his wife a mummy makeover voucher and she was so offended she promptly left him. And another where it was so successful that the recipient woman ran off with her tennis coach. Proceed with caution.
With tummy tucks from £5,600, boob jobs from £4,000 and nose jobs from £3,000, nor is it a cheap option.

Armpit Botox and similar treatments for excessive sweating

A common pre-Oscar night or wedding day treatment, Botox costing from £350 is injected into the armpits to eliminate or reduce sweating for several months.
However, one of the side-effects is that sweat can then appear somewhere else, as the body still needs to get rid of it.
On the forehead, back of the neck and between the legs are common areas where this can occur instead - and that's certainly not a good look.

Designer vaginas to have the 'lady garden' of a 16-year-old again

There is an increasingly popular trend in women choosing to have these procedures which start at £2,500.
It is often linked to internet pornography creating unrealistic images of what women should look like downstairs - which if true, is a pretty horrifying incentive.

Jordan has confessed to having had treatment to her "lady areas" but said it was for medical reasons.
But it's not just for porn stars and celebs. The most recent NHS figures show a 70 per cent increase in the number of women having labiaplasty on the NHS, so the trend shows no sign of abating. We came across one example where a mother and daughter had this done on the same day then compared results. Too much information!

Eyelash transplants

This procedure works in the same way as hair treatment for balding men, where living hair follicles are grafted on to the upper eyelid.

Considered a "must-have" for women who lust for longer, thicker lashes or who have lost lashes through overuse of extensions (yes, this is possible). The surgeon injects the hair into the eyelids, normally under a local anaesthetic. After the treatment, patients have to wear goggles at night to stop themselves scratching them out in their sleep as they are so itchy. The "after" photos are very scary indeed - weeping, scabby, swollen and bruised eyelids, worse than a heavyweight boxer after 12 rounds.
Complications can include severe itching, eyelid infection, ingrown hairs and even inward turning of the eyelid against the eyeball.
The transplanted hair will also continue to grow like hair on your head, so will need to be trimmed regularly and curled to shape like normal lashes. Costs start at £3,500.

Ankle liposuction

"Cankles" happen where the calf meets directly with the ankle giving it a swollen appearance due to a lack of muscle or a build-up of fluid.
With ankle liposuction, fatty deposits are removed to trim and shape the ankle area.
However, as ankles are primarily made up of muscle and bone and contain a number of key nerves and veins, the procedure, costing from £800, is much more complex and risky than liposuction in other areas.
Cheryl Cole was recently photographed with cankles, showing that it isn't always related to weight.
Contour irregularities, nerve damage, blood clots and hanging skin are just some of the reported side-effects and the swelling can take several months to go down, rather defeating the object.
And if you thought these were a step too far, wait until you see what could be just around the corner due to popular demand...

Rib removal with tummy tuck to create an hourglass figure

There's a long list of celebrities who have been rumoured to have had this done: Cher, Jane Fonda, Raquel Welch, Tori Spelling, Pamela Anderson, Janet Jackson... the list goes on.
As far as we could see, none of the rumours has ever been proved to be true.
But our research showed that chat rooms still abound with people seeking out where they can get it done - despite the fact they wouldn't be able to breathe properly, bend or drive for several weeks and that side-effects can include collapsed lungs, nerve damage, perforation of the diaphragm, infection or pneumonia.

  • The first book in the Never Mind The Botox series by Penny Avis and Joanna Berry, is called Alex and is out now (£6.99, Matador). For more information visit

    Plastic surgery Babylon

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